Thank you for all of your wonderful comments on how beautiful my baby is and how much you like the name Satya. I can’t remember if I mentioned the meaning of the name: it means true or truth. I don’t see how it gets any better than that.
Now that the drugs have worn off and we’re slowly wrapping our brains around this new little person, I think I am ready to tell Satya’s birth story. It’s quite a doozy, just to warn you.
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5AM last Saturday morning I woke up to horrible back pain. The pain was coming in waves, so I knew that this was the beginning of my contractions. I was quite shocked about how intense they were. I would never say that they were “mild”. If this was mild, I was in deep trouble. All I could think about for the next couple of hours was how badly I wanted to make strawberry muffins. I was searching on the internet for recipes, but ended up not making any since it was so early in the morning, and it was kind of hard to concentrate. The contractions got worse and worse and closer together, I was convinced this was going to be a quick and done deal by the end of the night, just like I wanted it. We finally left for the hospital 12 hours after I had my first contraction. We went to the triage, which is where they check you out to see if it’s time to admit you. I was convinced that I would be at least 4 cm dilated. When they finally got to see me, I was 100% effaced and only 1 cm. I was so disappointed. With the amount of pain I was in, I couldn’t understand how I wasn’t further along. We waited for another two hours to see how I progressed, and I was still only 1 cm. (WTF) The midwife held on to my back and stomach to rate the contractions and even he said that they were very strong. Although they usually don’t admit people until they’re 4 cm, they decided to admit me since the contractions were so strong and they were still convinced that things would move smoothly.
So around 11pm or midnight we got to our birthing room. Nice room, very spacious, with a jacuzzi. By 1 am, I had dilated to 4cm. Hurray! I took a long bath in the jacuzzi and fortunately it took some of the pain out of my back, but it also intensified my contractions. At this point I think my contractions were 5-6 minutes apart, all night long. By 5 am (which, to remind you was 24 hours after my first contraction), I had dilated to 5 cm only and the Doctor was basically pleading me to give in to pain management because we were only half way there and I hadn’t slept at all or gotten to the “hard part”. Lovey and I were determined to do this completely natural, and let me tell you, we are both very stubborn. The nurses had asked me numerous times about getting an epidural. I refused each time, no matter how much pain I was in. So the doctor finally convinced us that getting an epidural and then breaking my water would get things going and by noon we’d have our baby. After many tears, I agreed, although I felt defeated. After 24 hours of massive pain, and now I was going to give in to meds? Seemed like a cop-out. But at the same time, I knew it would be a relief and get us that much closer to meeting our baby.
So in went the epidural, and my blood pressure plummeted. It took them four medications to stabilize my blood pressure. FYI, I don’t even take advil for a headache, you can only imagine how pissed I was that I was being pumped with all these meds (despite the fact that I knew my BP was scary low). Once they stabilized my BP, they broke my water and gave me Pitocin to augment the contractions and get things going. Well, guess what? All contractions stopped. I would occasionally have a few but they were so weak they weren’t considered adequate. How disappointing, and especially since we weren’t told that these things could happen. I thought it was a given that Pitocin sped things along. It does for most people. I was able to sleep for the first time in over a day, which was nice, although I woke up having a major panic attack. I was mentally and I thought physically ready to push, to do it, to meet my baby. They checked my dilation again (it is now about 3pm Sunday)....I was at 6 cm. It took 8 hours to dilate one more cm. I was so disheartened, I never thought it would end. Well, for the first time ever, Lovey and I really believed that a C-section was in my future. One of my worst fears. Believe me there were a lot of tears and feelings of defeat. The Dr. said I was a prime candidate for a natural birth and they were all perplexed to why things weren’t working right. My body just didn’t want to cooperate. (WTF).
So drugged up even more (but I was awake), in to the OR we went and although it was a very surreal experience, about a half hour later we had our beautiful baby who was a great screamer from the first minute! The surgery was a great success. We thought yay, it’s all done and our baby is healthy and perfect and we can just enjoy it all.
Well, once I was out of recovery and into my PostPartum room, I started hemorrhaging quite horribly. My uterus wouldn’t clamp down, therefore I was losing a lot of blood and I was not able to clot. Well, I don’t want to get too graphic, but there were many hours of manual contracting going on in my uterus. Supposedly I was on many meds, but it was by far the worst pain I had ever experienced (since what I thought was my worst pain ever had happened the day before). After four or so hours, they were able to save my uterus and get my body doing what it should.
The next morning I had to have a blood transfusion and was just so incredibly sore. The next few days were hard, as you can imagine. Both emotionally and physically.
Everything we had said we didn’t want came true. Almost to the point of needing a hysterectomy, my absolute biggest fear for that situation. I am blessed that I had a great doctor and her team working very hard to make sure that didn’t happen.
Fast forward a week. It’s amazing how quickly the body can heal. I am already feeling very good. Sure, I’m a bit delirious from lack of sleep, but I wouldn’t trade in any amount of sleep for the chance to spend time with my beautiful baby. I am highly anemic and still pretty sore. My feet are slowly becoming less like elephant feet and I hope to have some color in my skin soon. Satya is doing so well, she’s gained almost all her birth weight back and is eating like a champ. She’s a bit jaundiced, but hey, most babies are!
My Lovey never left my side throughout this whole ordeal, and Satya was never out of our sight. It was hard enough being the one going through it all, I can’t imagine watching it all. My husband has a lot of Faith and I don’t think I would’ve been able to get through it all without him and without knowing that my baby was ok.
Now I’m just trying to keep my hormones in control (impossible) and keep the milk flowing. I’m having a blast just being a cow and getting to kiss my baby all day.
It’s amazing how something supposedly so natural can be so scary. You just never know.
Stay tuned for the name contest results and the coolest diaper bag ever
